There are times--definitive moments--when you feel your life being inexorably drawn to a pivotal event. Helplessly, it compels you forward to meet yourself in an almalgamous, harmonic, metaphysical supernova.
Pithy had one of these moments in the Lin's produce section.
"Excuse me? Do you mind if I ask you a weird question...?"
At this point it was probably not rude of us to respond with, "Well, yeah I kinda do...not really in to that whole weird question thing..." After all, the woman posing the question was quite forward herself--but, like I said, "compelled forward..."
"Sure," Prudence responds, somewhat wary.
"I don't mean to pry...but,"--we have since learned that this in fact means they do want to pry. Don't ask us why she prefaced it this way. It would have been much more accurate to lead in with an honest "I mean to pry..." But we tell it like it is--or was, as the case may be. "I don't mean to pry...but, are you Pentecostal?"
(Later, when we examine this story at all possible angles, Tom will say the word was Mennonite, Prudie will reinforce Pentecostal, and Jerry--in form--struggles with Mentecostal as an actual, valid lifestyle.) Take stock of ourselves: What are we? Where are we from? What physical characteristics led to such an inquiry? The denim skirt? The collective long sleeves? Or was it something elusive--an aura--that left such an air of mystery that Creepywoman in Lin's produce section (we can call her this now) was compelled--in her own self discovery moment (that she has fluid boundaries and an inadequate knowledge of social etiquette)--to ask, "Are you Pentecostal?"
All this flashes in our mind's eye--well we kind of evenly distribute it between us: Prudie takes on the skirt, Tom thinks about the sleeves. The expectation builds in a crescendo of--well, expectancy, coming to a jarring halt at our contrite: "No, sorry."
That's it, "No, sorry." Our life defining moment was an apology--and we hadn't even done something wrong. Better luck next time I guess. As a note: the offending skirt earned us another encounter at Lin's produce section (what is it with avocados that misleads "Talk to us, we don't mind...spill your heart out...") this time concerning GAP, Maurices, and other such appropriate places of apparel for obtaining mysterious denim skirts.
Lesson learned: "not prying" + avocados = gawkamole
Top Heavy
1 week ago
4 comments:
A missed opportunity to rid the world, if only temporarily, of such a prying busybody---Perhaps next time you could respond with an "No, I'm atheist." This small white lie is sure to dash their curiosity to bits, leaving you feeling victorious over the evils of the over-inquisitive.
College is all about broadening boundaries and updating your “defining moments”, or in other words making “connections”. Orientation Leader gave it straight. College is not just the accumulation of facts and data, but of experience. Looking at the sequence of events, I can see that the stars chronically orchestrated these “moments”. The wisdom was given and the opportunity presented. Where was the execution? This lady was obviously looking for a connection (the search continues after college), and crashed into your compelling supernova of events. There she was brutally whirled and sent flying out into other webs and auras of compulsion. The correct response is “no, are you?” And from there the connection starts, ending with the stars parting and comets streaming through the sky as both parties part, understanding and understood. If you are looking to be ignored by the stars, think again, they serve our need to grow; sometimes this is accomplished by helping others. So, keep the denim skirt and long sleeves, and continue to buy produce, all at the same time if necessary. Make connections.
Pentecostalism is a renewalist religious movement within Christianity, that places special emphasis on a direct personal experience of God through the baptism of the Holy Spirit which is evidenced by speaking in other tongues. The term Pentecostal is derived from Pentecost, a Greek term describing the Jewish Feast of Weeks. For Christians, this event commemorates the descent of the Holy Spirit upon the followers of Jesus Christ, as described in the Book of Acts, Chapter 2, and Pentecostals tend to see their movement as reflecting the same kind of spiritual power, worship styles and teachings that were found in the early church. For this reason, some Pentecostals also use the term Apostolic and/or Full Gospel to describe their movement.
As for avacados......I just don't see the relationship! I TRIED!
Neither did we...neither did we... To quote ourselves...:
"What is it with avocados that misleads...?"
Perhaps a full investigation into avocados and their suspicious relationship with unstable religious groups should be launched. Any takers?
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