Are We There Yet

The moment night groaned to morning in that awful, jarring disconnect devoid of all possible optimism, Pithy knew. Something was not right. Temporarily, we were content to blame the alarm’s negligence in allowing not one, not two, not even four, but six—yes, six!—snoozes (don’t worry, its employment has been terminated—the replacement will not cower so easily). However, upon leaving the house for work at an alarming speed, Pithy knew it was more than sleeping late. Indeed, all around were signs of notquiteright which slipped passed notice, but, upon reexamining at a later time, were painfully obvious: the day was counting up its birds and couldn’t get the answer right; Murphy’s daughter stayed out all night without checking in; Karma was cranky for an unmentionable reason—which wasn’t that hard to figure out.

Consequently, Pithy’s day was long—not I------I this long…but I--------------------------------------------------------I this long. We’ve all had those days when lunch felt like we should be clocking out to go home, but it’s not every day that morning “take 5” at seven thirty feels like lunch and nine o’clock’s “take 15” finds you biting back “K guys, cya later—gotta get home, I’m beat!” Today, Pithy was dazed and confused to find that clock-out came a full EIGHT hours after clock-in. Stranger still was the fact that they keenly felt as if the eight hours had actually transpired.

Death by PowerPoint, Microsoft’s “classic view” (note to Microsoft: there is nothing timeless about it—it’s UGLY. Get rid of it.), thermostats governed by a heating/cooling system in OREM (reminder: we’re in Cedar)—all these lend to foot tapping and count downs; when coupled with the human factor—hmmm, not entirely sure that’s 100% accurate—the venting of which would lead to HR inappropriate comments about people and their intelligence, and which Pithy will reserve to tell in person (but we will clue in that they involve words like retard and moron)—this day has been dubbed: Day Too Long. So let it be written. So let it be done….please!